antara berpacaran dan menyegerakan pernikahan

Pemuda itu menangis tersedu-sedu di samping mihrab mesjid. Mushaf ia dekap erat-kuat ke dadanya. Sesekali ia me-lap air mata yang meleleh. Ia merasa begitu rapuh dan lemah. Begitu tak berdaya menghadapi seorang wanita. Ia telah tergila-gila pada wanita itu. Senyuman wanita itu bagai purnama di gelap gulita malam. Suara wanita itu laksana nyanyian bidadari yang merasuk ke pori-pori jiwanya.

Ia menangisi dirinya yang tak lagi bisa merasakan nikmatnya berzikir. Menangisi hatinya yang tak lagi bisa khusyuk dalam shalat. Menangisi pikirannya yang selalu membawanya terbang ke wanita itu. Oh, sungguh hebat deritanya. Dulu ia begitu kokoh dan teguh. Orang-orang menganggapnya seorang laki-laki yang punya prinsip dan berkarakter. Apalagi saat orang-orang tahu dia begitu mampu menjaga hubungan dengan wanita, popularitas keshalehannnya semakin dikenal dan menjadi buah bibir.

Itu dulu, namun kini ia begitu tak berdaya dan rapuh. Wanita itu betul-betul telah membuatnya terpikat. Seorang wanita yang dalam pandangannya begitu anggun dan sempurna. Cantik, manis, cerdas, hafal al-Qur`an, sopan dan lembut dan lain-lainya. Seorang wanita yang menurutnya layak dijadikan pasangan hidup menuju sorga. Seorang wanita yang semua kriteria calon istri dambaan ia temukan pada dirinya.

Hampir tiap malam ia menangis. Jika dulu, ia menangis di kegelapan malam karena dimabuk rindu pada Sang Pencipta, kini ia menangis karena dimabuk rindu pada makhluk-Nya. Apakah Allah tengah menguji dirinya. Apakah Allah tengah menguji kejujuran cintanya. Ataukah memang sudah waktunya ia menikah.

Ia teringat dengan pesan-pesan Ustadznya sebelum berangkat ke Mesir dulu, pesan-pesan yang masih terekam kuat dalam memorinya.

"Anakku, ketahuilah dalam perjalananmu menuntut ilmu nanti, kamu akan diuji dengan banyak hal, dengan kesusahan hidup, kesulitan biaya, lingkungan, kawan-kawan, dan lainnya. Teguhkan selalu niat di hatimu dan mintalah pertolongan pada Allah setiap waktu. Dan ingatlah, ujian terberat yang akan kamu hadapi nanti adalah wanita, maka berhati-hatilah menghadapi wanita. Jangan pernah mengikuti ajakan nafsu yang menyesatkan."

"Anakku, berpacaran yang saat ini banyak digandrungi anak-anak muda adalah sikap laki-laki bermental kerupuk dan pecundang dan tipe wanita yang tak punya harga diri, menjalin hubungan secara syar`i dan menikahi dengan cara-cara yang baik, itulah akhlak seorang laki-laki yang didamba dan sikap seorang wanita calon penghuni sorga. Bila godaan itu terasa berat bagimu, berpuasa tak sanggup mengobatimu, maka menikahlah, insya Allah itu lebih berkah dan mengantarkan pada kebaikan."

"Anakku, jika kamu mengira berpacaran itu adalah jalan menuju pernikahan, maka engkau telah tertipu oleh nafsumu. Engkau telah termakan bujuk rayu setan durjana. Apakah engkau mau memetik buah dari pohon sebelum waktunya? Apakah engkau mau membeli barang yang telah usang dan pernah dipakai orang?"

"Anakku, janganlah engkau mengira, pacaran yang Ustadz maksud bertemu dan jalan berdua-duan semata, tapi jagalah matamu, pendengaranmu, hatimu dan pikiranmu. Janganlah menjadi pemuda yang lemah. Ingatlah, engkau adalah pemimpin, jangan biarkan hawa nafsu yang memimpinmu."

"Jika suatu saat nanti, dorongan untuk menikah begitu kuat dan menyesak di dadamu, engkau merasa telah siap, namun orang tua belum merestui dan ada jalan lain yang menghambat. Ustadz sarankan, bersabarlah, bersabarlah, dan bersabarlah. Sembari terus mencoba dan berdoa tiada henti pada Allah. Sesungguhnya Allah bersama orang-orang yang sabar. Dan ketahuilah, orang-orang yang sabar akan mendapatkan pahala yang berlipat, dan orang-orang sabar akan memetik mutiara iman yang begitu banyak dalam kesabarannya itu. Dan yakinlah sesungguhnya bersama satu kesulitan ada banyak kemudahan."

"Anakku, jangalah engkau tergoda oleh nafsumu, janganlah engkau tertipu dengan bisikan musuhmu, setan durjana. Mungkin Allah tengah mengujimu, dan menyiapkan untukmu hadiah yang indah. Maka selalulah berbaik sangka pada Allah."

Nasehat-nasehat berharga itu begitu mampu menjadi penawar bagi hatinya yang gelisah. Tapi, itu hanya bertahan sebentar, ledakan perasaannya pada wanita itu ternyata lebih dahsyat dan meluap-luap. Pesan-pesan itu hanya bertahan sesaat, lalu ketika desakan perasaan itu kembali merasuki jiwa, ia menjadi begitu rapuh dan lemah.

Sampai pada akhirnya ia menelpon Ustadznya di Indonesia. Ia menceritakan kegelisahan hatinya, keresahan jiwa, dan gejolak rasa yang selalu menyesak di dadanya. Ustadznya berpesan kembali,

"Anakku, Ustadz bisa memahami keadaanmu, barangkali sudah waktunya bagimu untuk menggenapkan setengah agamamu. Ustadz sarankan lakukanlah shalat istikharah, jika engkau menemukan ada tanda-tanda ke arah sana, maka lakukanlah shalat hajat sebanyak-banyaknya, insya Allah, mudah-mudahan dengan cara demikian Allah membuka jalan untukmu. Mintalah pada Allah dengan air mata penuh harap, menangislah sejadi-jadinya di hadapan Allah. Yakinlah, Allah tidak akan menyia-nyiakan hamba-Nya."
[][][]

Satu tahun kemudian, sesudah kesabaran yang panjang, setelah menyelesaikan hafalan al-Qur`annya, ia pun menggenapkan setengah agamanya di penghujung bulan Juni 2010. Ia sangat bahagia. Kebahagiaan yang tak bisa dlukiskan dengan kata-kata. Ia telah menikah dengan wanita dambaannya, seorang wanita sorga yang Allah hadirkan ke bumi untuknya. Allah telah memilihkan untuknya seorang pendamping hidup yang mecintai Allah dan dirinya dengan sepenuh jiwa dan raga.

Tak sia-sia selama ini ia menjaga dirinya dari tergelincir pada perbuatan yang haram. Ia sampaikan kerinduannya terhadap wanita itu pada Allah setiap malam, ia titipkan penjagaan untuk wanita itu pada Allah setiap saat. Ia hantarkan doa-doa penuh ketulusan untuk kebaikan dan keselamatan wanita itu selama ini. Dan kini, Allah mengizinkannya untuk memetik buah kesabarannya selama ini. Sesungguhnya Allah tidak menyia-nyiakan hamba yang berserah diri pada-Nya.

"Untukmu Yang Akan Menuntut Ilmu di Negeri Seberang"
Semua Akan Indah Pada Waktunya

"Why does Allah allow suffering and evil in this world???"

In the Name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful.

All praise and thanks are due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon His Messenger.

“Indeed Allah is All-Powerful (Al-`Aziz) and He is able to do all things (`ala kull sha’in qadir). The Qur’an has mentioned this hundreds of times. It is also mentioned in the Qur’an that Allah is the Creator and He is the Best Creator. “Glory be to Allah, the best Creator.” (Al-Mu’minun: 14)

But then the question comes why do pain and sufferings exist in the world. We find sickness, old age and death. We see things that are ugly, people who are insane and foolish. There are storms, earthquakes, floods, draught and famine. We also see people commit sins, show disloyalty, unfaithfulness, greed and insincerity. We see people commit rapes, murders; they fight and make wars. We know all these and many more problems. There are evils caused by human beings and there are natural disasters. There are suffering for individuals and there are those that involve a large number of people.

But we also know that this is not the whole story. Besides all these negative things, we also see beauty, health, prosperity, life, birth, wisdom, intelligence, growth and progress. We also see goodness among people, faith, sincerity, charity, love and the spirit of sacrifice. We also see a lot of virtue and piety. It is wrong to see one side of the coin and not to see the other side. Any philosophy that concentrates on one aspect of the creation and denies or ignores the other side is partially true and partial truths are no truth at all.

It is also the fact that the element of good is more in the creation than the element of evil. We all see that there are more people who are healthy than those who are sick. There are more that eat well than those who starve.

There are more that lead decent life than those who commit crimes. Goodness is the rule and evil is the exception. Virtue is the norm and sin is the aberration. Generally trees bear fruits, the flowers bloom, the winds move smoothly.

But then the question is why does Allah allow these exceptions to the rules?

Let us ask this question to understand Allah’s ways in His creation. The Qur’an tells us that good, evil and whatever happens in this world happens by Allah’s Will (mashi’at Allah). Only Allah knows fully His Will. We finite beings cannot grasp fully His infinite Will and Wisdom. He runs His universe the way He deems fit. The Qur’an tells us that Allah is Wise and everything that Allah does is right, just, good and fair. We must submit and surrender to His Will. The Qur’an has not given us all the details about Allah’s Will, but it has enlightened us with the guidance that is useful and sufficient for us. There are several points that we should keep in our mind to understand this issue:

1. First of all, Allah did not make this world a permanent world. This is a temporary world and everything here has a time limit. When its times comes it will die, come to an end and finish. Neither the good things of this world are forever, nor the bad things eternal. We are here for a short time and we are being tested. Those who will pass this test will find an eternal world that is perfect and permanent. Those who will fail this test shall see the evil consequences of their sins and corruption.

2. Allah has placed a physical law and a moral law in this universe. Allah allows suffering to occur when one or more of these laws are broken. The physical law is based on cause and effect. Sickness comes if one does not take care of one’s health or is exposed to infections. A car accident occurs when one is not alert, or drives in a careless manner, or if the cars are not checked, roads and freeways are not made and kept in right shape, or the traffic laws are not right or not properly enforced. Study of causes and effects is very important to facilitate safeguards. Even here we should keep in mind that Allah often saves us and He does not let us suffer from every negligence. How many times it happens that we are not careful and still we reach safely to our destinations. The way people drive in some cities, it is a miracle that more accidents do not happen and more people do not suffer. Allah says:

“(Allah) Most Gracious! It is He Who has taught the Qur’an. He has created man: He has taught him speech (and Intelligence). The sun and the moon follow courses (exactly) computed; and the herbs and the trees both (alike) bow in adoration. And the Firmament has He raised high, and He has set up the Balance (of Justice), in order that you may not transgress (due) balance. So establish weight with justice and fall not short in the balance. It is He Who has spread out the earth for (His) creatures." (Ar-Rahman:1-10)

The way we exceed the measures set by Allah and violate His laws of cause and effect is incredible. It is really the mercy of Allah that we are saved. Strictly speaking, the question should not be why does Allah allow suffering, but how much Allah protects us and saves us all the time in spite of our violations and negligence. The Qur’an says:

“If Allah were to punish people according to what they deserve, He would not leave on the back of the (earth) a single living creature: but He gives them respite for a stated Term: when their Term expires, verily Allah has in His sight all His servants." (Fatir:45)

But sometimes Allah does punish people because of their violations of His laws whether they are physical or moral. The Qur’an tells us that many nations and communities were destroyed because of their sinful lifestyles:

“If they treat thy (mission) as false, so did the Peoples before them (with their Prophets), the People of Noah, and Ad and Thamud. Those of Abraham and Lut; and the Companions of the Madyan people; and Moses was rejected (in the same way). But I granted respite to the Unbelievers, and (only) after that did I punish them: but how (terrible) was My rejection (of them)! How many populations have We destroyed, which were given to wrong-doing! They tumbled down on their roofs. And how many wells are lying idle and neglected, and castles lofty and well-built?" (Al-Hajj: 42-45)

3. Suffering can also be a test and trial for some people. Allah allows some people to suffer in order to test their patience and steadfastness. Even Allah’s Prophets and Messengers were made to suffer. Prophet Ayyub is mentioned in the Qur’an as a Prophet who was very patient. Good people sometimes suffer but their sufferings heal others and bring goodness to their communities. People learn lessons from their good examples. Martyrs die for their faith, soldiers give their lives for their nations and this brings liberation and freedom for their people.

4. Allah sometimes allows some people to suffer to test others, how they react to them. When you see a person who is sick, poor and needy, then you are tested by Allah. Allah is there with that suffering person to test your charity and your faith. In a very moving Hadith Qudsi (Divine Hadith) the Prophet, peace be upon him, said:

“Allah will say on the Day of Judgment, ‘O son of Adam, I was sick and you did not visit Me.’ He will say, ‘O my Lord, how could I visit You, when you are the Lord of the Worlds.’ Allah will say, ‘Did you not know that My servant so-and-so was sick and you did not visit him? Did you not know that if you had visited him, you would have found Me there?’ Allah will say, ‘O son of Adam, I asked you for food and you fed Me not.’ He shall say, ‘O my Lord, how could I feed you and you are the Lord of the Worlds?’ And Allah will say, ‘Did you not know that My servant so-and-so was in need of food and you did not feed him? Did you not know that if you had fed him, you would have found that to have been for Me?’ ‘O son of Adam, I asked you for water and you did not give Me to drink.’ The man shall say, ‘O my Lord, how could I give You water, when You are the Lord of the Worlds?’ Allah will say, ‘My servant so-and-so asked you for water and you did not give him to drink water. Did you not know that if you had given him to drink, you would have found that to have been for Me.’ (Muslim, Hadith no. 4661)

Prophet `Isa (Jesus), peace be upon him, is also reported to have said something similar. (See Matthew 25: 35-45)

So to summarize, we can say that sufferings occur to teach us that we must adhere to Allah’s natural and moral laws. It is sometimes to punish those who violate Allah’s natural or moral laws. It is to test our faith in Allah and to test our commitment to human values and charity. Whenever we encounter suffering we should ask ourselves, “Have we broken any law of Allah?” Let us study the cause of the problem and use the corrective methods. “Could it be a punishment?” Let us repent and ask forgiveness and reform our ways. “Could it be a test and trial for us?” Let us work hard to pass this test.

Believers face the sufferings with prayers, repentance and good deeds. The non-believers face the sufferings with doubts and confusions. They blame Allah or make arguments against Him.

May Allah keep us on the right path, Amen!

Misconceptions about backbiting.....

Misconception #5: I’m not backbiting, I’m just saying.

When people respond with, “I’m just saying,” they’re telling themselves that what they’re mentioning is not something so bad as backbiting, it’s just “saying” things as they are. In other words, they’re trivializing the act, and telling themselves that backbiting isn’t really all that bad.

But backbiting is no walk in the park. It’s one of the most disgusting acts one could ever commit. That’s why Allah subḥāna wa ta’āla asks those who backbite,

Quran 49:12 “Would one of you love to eat the flesh of his dead brother (or sister)?”

God Himself is comparing backbiting to something vilely rancid, so no one is fooled to think it’s not an inhuman act like that of murder or rape. The imagery of you eating the dead carcass of the person you’re talking about really paints a clear picture.

Not only that, Allah is asking us if we would love eating that flesh. It’s as if He is saying not only is backbiting as disgusting as eating that person’s dead flesh, when we backbite, it’s as if we enjoy eating it, too.

“You’re not, just saying. You’re going to that person’s body after their janāzah, ripping off their thigh, chewing it up, and enjoying it, too.

Misconception #4: I’m not backbiting, everyone already knows about this person, anyway.

If a person is mentioning things about someone already known, not only are they still backbiting, they’re following the footsteps of hypocrites. The hypocrites of Medinah spread rumors about ‘Ā’isha, may Allah be pleased with her, and as a result were cursed by Allah to the depths of Hellfire. Quran 24:11

“Mentioning what everyone already knows about somebody is a dangerous path to Hellfire. Is spreading the news so important that it’s worth living with black fire that’s 70 times hotter, boiling puss drinks and having your cheeks ripped off your face?”

Misconception #3: I’m not backbiting, I’m warning others about a person’s mistakes.

Human beings have a natural desire to warn others about harm. That’s why when they see something wrong with someone else, they’ll personally identify those characteristics as a problem, make a decision to be careful about it for themselves, and naturally want to notify others about it as well.

But that’s where the problem comes in. We want to naturally talk about someone else’s faults, but if we do, it’s backbiting. How can we get past this natural desire that’s so troublesome?

The Prophet sal Allahu ‘alayhi wa sallam said backbiting is “talking about your brother in a manner which he does not like.”Muslim, Book 032, Chapter 18, Number 6265

If we feel the desire to go out and warn someone about it, do so on the person with the faults in the first place in a kind and sincere manner. Our problem as Muslims is that we talk a lot about people behind their backs but never confront them in person.

“Talking about others negative traits in anyway shape or form is backbiting and none of your business, and if you stay away from it you’re working towards guaranteed admission to Paradise.”

Misconception #2: I’m not backbiting, I’ll tell them later or I don’t care, I can say it to their face.

Some people justify backbiting by thinking if they inform the person later they were talking about them behind their back, it makes the act okay. But telling someone you backbit about them after the fact is a part of the process of repenting and making up for the sin. It has to be done sincerely, with regret and shame for the act, driven by a balanced fear of Allah’s punishment and a hope in His Mercy.

What’s worse is when some people claim they, “don’t care” about backbiting and they supposedly can or will say what they backbit about someone to them. Not only is that even more of a misunderstanding than planning to tell them later, it just shows two things. One, they’re just a jerk. It isn’t bad enough that they’re backbiting, but they have to go and act “brave” by claiming they can tell the person the insult to their face.

Backbiting about someone with the intention to tell them later doesn’t make it okay. It’s still backbiting. And claiming you, “don’t care” and can say it to their face shows that you’re a jerk and don’t care about the Hellfire.

Misconception #1: I’m not backbiting, it’s true.

This, by far, is the most common misconception and response we find Muslims making when we warn them about backbiting. They think that backbiting is only when you mention bad things about people that aren’t true. Is that really the case?

Going back to the definition of backbiting, the Prophet sal Allahu ‘alayhi wa sallam said backbiting is to mention things about your brother (or sister) which they don’t like. After the Companions heard this definition, one of them asked, “what do you think about if what I say about that person is true?”

“If (that) is actually found (in that person) what you claimed, you, in fact, backbit him. And if that’s not in that person, it’s slander,” the Prophet sal Allahu ‘alayhi wa sallam answered.

This shows that we’ve got it all wrong. Just because what we’re saying is true, doesn’t mean it’s not backbiting. In fact, it proves that we are indeed backbiting, because backbiting is true information. If it wasn’t true, we’d be doing something worse than backbiting, slander.

“Yeah, you’re backbiting, because the Prophet sal Allahu ‘alayhi wa sallam if it’s true, which you’re saying it is, then it’s backbiting.”

Conclusion

Backbiting is no misdemeanor. It’s a federal offense. In fact, it’s more than that. It’s a universal act of ethical treason, the likes of which transcend this world and has severe consequences in the next.

We need to remember that when we signed up to become Muslim, we agreed to follow all of the rules, and one of the rules is that for anyone else who signed up for the contract of Lā ilāh ha illa Allāh, Muḥammmad al-rasūlullāh you can’t ever talk behind their back. Doing so is not only a horrible sin and a disgusting act, it’s one of the worst things you could ever do to your Muslim brother or sister.

While you may be fired up to use the responses to these misconceptions and are trying to think of people you could use them on, ask yourself if the person to respond to is none other than you. Do you have these misconceptions about backbiting? Have you ever made any of these five justifications or something similar to them? If so, give yourself the responses and work on yourself first, and eventually, you can work on correcting others, as well.

She choses him as her husband

Bismillah Arrahman Arraheem
Islam has protected woman’s pride and humanity, and has respected her wishes with regard to the choice of a husband with whom she will spend the rest of her life. It is not acceptable for anyone, no matter who he is, to force a woman into a marriage with a man she does not like.

There is no clearer indication of this than the story of Barirah, an Ethiopian slave-girl who belonged to ‘Utbah ibn Abu Lahab, who forced her to marry another slave whose name was Mughith. She would never have accepted him as a husband if she had been in control of her own affairs. ‘A’ishah (radhiallahu anha) took pity on her, so she bought her and set her free. Then this young woman felt that she was free and in control of her own affairs, and that she could take a decision about her marriage. She asked her husband for a divorce. Her husband used to follow her, weeping, whilst she rejected him. Bukhari quotes Ibn ‘Abbas describing this freed woman who insisted on the annulment of her marriage to someone she did not love; the big-hearted Prophet (sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam) commented on this moving sight, and sought to intervene. Ibn ‘Abbas said:

“Barirah’s husband was a slave, who was known as Mughith. I can almost see him, running after her and crying, with tears running down onto his beard. The Prophet (sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam) said to ‘Abbas, ‘O ‘Abbas, do you not find it strange, how much Mugith loves Barirah, and how much Barirah hates Mughith?’ The Prophet (sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam) said (to Barirah), ‘Why do you not go back to him?’ She said, ‘O Messenger of Allah, are you commanding me to do so?’ He said, ‘I am merely trying to intervene on his behalf.’ She said, ‘I have no need of him.’”

The Prophet (sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam) was deeply moved by this display of human emotion: deep and overwhelming love on the part of the husband, and equally powerful hatred on the part of the wife. He could not help but remind the wife, and ask her why she did not go back to him, as he was her husband and the father of her child. This believing woman asked him, whether he was ordering her to do so: was this a command, a binding obligation? The Prophet (sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam), this great law-giver and educator, replied that he was merely trying to intercede and bring about reconciliation if possible; he was not trying to force anybody to do something they did not wish to.

Let those stubborn, hard-hearted fathers who oppress their own daughters listen to the teaching of the Prophet (sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam)!

The Muslim woman who understands the teachings of her religion has wise and correct standards when it comes to choosing a husband. She does not concern herself just with good looks, high status, a luxurious lifestyle or any of the other things that usually attract women. She looks into his level of religious commitment and his attitude and behavior, because these are the pillars of a successful marriage, and the best features of a husband. Islamic teaching indicates the importance of these qualities in a potential husband, as Islam obliges a woman to accept the proposal of anyone who has these qualities, lest fitnah and corruption become widespread in society:

“If there comes to you one with whose religion and attitude you are satisfied, then give your daughter to him in marriage, for if you do not do so, fitnah and mischief will become widespread on earth.”

In order to achieve this great goal of strengthening the marriage bond, and establishing a stable family life, it is essential to choose the right partner in the first place

Among the great Muslim women who are known for their strength of character, lofty aspirations and far-sightedness in their choice of a husband is Umm Sulaym bint Milhan, who was one of the first Ansar women to embrace Islam. She was married to Malik ibn Nadar, and bore him a son, Anas. When she embraced Islam, her husband Malik was angry with her, and left her, but she persisted in her Islam. Shortly afterwards, she heard the news of his death, and she was still in the flower of her youth. She bore it all with the hope of reward, for the sake of Allah (subhanahu wa ta’ala) and devoted herself to taking care of her ten-year-old son Anas. She took him to the Prophet (sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam), so that he could serve him (and learn from him).

One of the best young men of Madinah, one of the best-looking, richest and strongest, came to seek her hand in marriage. This was Abu Talhah - before he became Muslim. Many of the young women of Yathrib liked him because of his wealth, strength and youthful good looks, and he thought that Umm Sulaym would joyfully rush to accept his offer. But to his astonishment, she told him, “O Abu Talhah, do you not know that your god whom you worship is just a tree that grew in the ground and was carved into shape by the slave of Banu so-and-so.” He said, “Of course.” She said, “Do you not feel ashamed to prostrate yourself to a piece of wood that grew in the ground and was carved by the slave of Banu so-and-so?” Abu Talhah was stubborn, and hinted to her of an expensive dowry and luxurious lifestyle, but she persisted in her point of view, and told him frankly: “O Abu Talhah, a man like you could not be turned away, but you are a disbelieving man, and I am a Muslim woman. It is not permitted for me to marry you, but if you were to embrace Islam, that would be my dowry (mahr), and I would ask you for nothing more.”


He returned the following day to try to tempt her with a larger dowry and more generous gift, but she stood firm, and her persistence and maturity only enhanced her beauty in his eyes. She said to him, “O Abu Talhah, do you not know that your god whom you worship was carved by the carpenter slave of so-and-so? If you were to set it alight, it would burn.” Her words came as a shock to Abu Talhah, and he asked himself, Does the Rabb (Cherisher and Sustainer) burn? Then he uttered the words: “Ashhadu an la ilaha ill-Allah wa ashhadu anna Muhammadan rasul-Allah.”

Then Umm Sulaym said to her son Anas, with joy flooding her entire being, “O Anas, marry me to Abu Talhah.” So Anas brought witnesses and the marriage was solemnized.

Abu Talhah was so happy that he was determined to put all his wealth at Umm Sulaym’s disposal, but hers was the attitude of the selfless, proud, sincere believing woman. She told him, “O Abu Talhah, I married you for the sake of Allah (subhanahu wa ta’ala) and I will not take any other dowry.” She knew that when Abu Talhah embraced Islam, she did not only win herself a worthy husband, but she also earned a reward from Allah (Subhanahu wa ta’ala) that was better than owning red camels (the most highly-prized kind) in this world, as she had heard the Prophet (sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam) say:

“If Allah (Subhanahu wa ta’ala) were to guide one person to Islam through you, it is better for you than owning red camels.”


Such great Muslim women are examples worthy of emulation, from whom Muslim women may learn purity of faith, strength of character, soundness of belief and wisdom in choosing a husband.

The concealed pear

Two Muslim girls in a classroom – one wearing a Hijab; the other one without.
The girl with no scarf – eager to have a laugh began to gossip and shout…

“Take off your headscarf – lets see the length of your hair…
Go on just this once – it’s only a dare!”

The girl with the Hijab looked back and proudly replied…
“There is no chance that I’ll let 14 devils float by my side”

The other girl scoffed still wanting to have fun…
“So you’re prepared to roast under the burning sun??”

“Yes – because the heat right now means nothing to me;
It is the hell fire which is extremely scary”

Girl with no scarf – still wanting to say more…
“Why are you wearing it? What is the purpose for?”

“Allah will keep evil and punishment away from me….
This Hijab is there in my life for security…
I love and value my faith – which is why I cover my head”
Smiling the girl in the Hijab had said.

The other girl tensed – but not showing she’s feeling bad….
“Why not show everyone your beauty – once you have, you’ll feel ever so glad!”


“The beauty is inside me – where Islam is growing in my heart…
…appreciating Allah is the way for a happy start!”

At this point, the girl with no Hijab had nothing else left to say…
She knew that the other girl was always joyful and confident each and every day.
She realised that this Sister in Hijab will always remain pure and never will walk in shame….
The girl with no scarf knew she wanted to be exactly the same.

This is why, when she went home – she made a very big decision.
She realised that loving Allah can put you in such a wonderful position.


In the classroom, the next day – this girl was wearing her Hijab for the first ever time – feeling so proud…
Looked at the other girl whom she had made fun of before had said out loud…

“Oh sister of Islam – forgive me for the things I have said….
Seeing the love you hold for our religion has today made me cover my head…
Your sweet and caring words that you so dearly expressed…
Made me see how Islam has given you so much respect


I know that Allah will gift those who follow Islam….
Wearing my Hijab – I know that I will be safe from any harm.

Thank you My Sister – for you who I now admire and congratulate
Together as Muslims, we should aim to reach Jannat’s Gates.”

The first girl – amazed, had happiness all over her face
Smiled with love and gave the Sister a lot of praise.
“Marshallah Sister – Indeed Allah will purify your heart and your deen…
Continue love for our faith and in Heaven we will be seen…
Wearing the Hijab – we will always stay as the ‘Respected
Girl’….


And to Allah we will be known as the ‘Concealed Pearl!’

SUNAN PAKUBUWANA IV DAN ISLAM (BAGIAN 4)

Sunan Paku Buwana IV dalam pandangan masyarakat Surakarta tidak saja dikenal sebagai pujangga yang mumpuni, tetapi juga dipercaya sebagai raja yang taat menjalankan ajaran agama islam. Ketaatan dalam menjalankan agama Islam, seperti tidak meninggalkan shalat lima waktu, shalat jumat dan mengharamkan minuman keras dan candu sudah terlihat sejak muda dan mesih berstatus sebagai putra mahkota.
Kegemarannya dalam menimba ilmu agama dari kyai dan guru agama menjadikan dirinya memiliki pengetahuan dan pemahaman yang luas tentang agama Islam. Keluasan pengetahuan Islam yang dimiliki oleh raja Surakarta ini dapat dilihat dari serat-serat piwulang karyanya, seperti Serat Wulang Reh, Wulang Dalem, dan Wulang Brata Sunu. Sebagian besar isi serat piwulung Sunan Pakubuwana IV disesuaikan dengan ajaran Islam. Tidak jarang dalam serat piwulang karyanya, ia mengutip langsung ayat-ayat al- Qur’an dan hadis demi memperkuat nasihat yang disampaikannya.
Kegemaran Sunan Paku Buwana IV dalam mencari ilmu agama telah mempertemukannya dengan berbagai macam guru agama dan kyai. Adakalanya kyai dan guru agama mempunyai pengaruh kuat terhadap raja Surakarta, sehingga tidak saja mempengaruhi sikap keagamaannya melainkan juga sikap politiknya. Peristiwa pakepung yang terjadi pada awal pemerintahannya merupakan suatu bukti adanya pengaruh kyai dan guru agama terhadap sikap politik yang dijalankannya.
Peristiwa Pakepung
Peristiwa pakepung terjadi pada tahun 1790 ketika Sunan Paku Buwana IV baru dua tahun dinobatkan sebagai raja Surakarta. Peristiwa ini tidak saja mempunyai latar belakang politis, yaitu adanya persaingan antar kerajaan penerus dinasti Mataram, melainkan juga latar belakang keagamaan. Adanya latar belakang semangat keagamaan yang kuat dari peristiwa ini menyebabkan banyak penulis menyebutnya sebagai gerakan keagamaan. H.J. de Graaf, misalnya, menyebut peristiwa pakepung memiliki beberapa kesamaan dengan gerakan Wahabiyah di Tanah Arab.1
peristiwa pakepung (Oktober-Desember 1790), sebagaimana diceritakan dalam babad pakepung.2 Berawal dari pengangkatan empat kyai dan santri- Kyai Wiradigda, penengah, Bahman, dan Nur Saleh- sebagai abdi dalem kinasih (abdi dalem terpercaya).
Pengaruh keempat abdi dalem kyai ini ternyata begitu besar pada Sunan sehingga banyak keputusan-keputusan politik didasarkan pada nasihatnya. Sunan Paku Buwana IV kemudian mulai mengadakan perubahan-perubahan, seperti :
1. Abdi dalem yang tidak patuh pada syariah agama ditindak, digeser dan bahkan ada yang dipecat seperti yang dialami Tumenggung Pringgalaya dan Tumenggung Mangkuyuda.
2. Sunan Paku Buwana IV juga mengharamkan minuman keras dan opium, sebagaimana ajaran agama Islam. Setiap hari Jumat, Sunan ini juga pergi ke masjid besar untuk melaksanakan shalat Jumat. Bahkan sering bertindak sebagai khatib atau pemberi khutbah Jumat.
Peristiwa yang terjadi di Keraton Surakarta ini menimbulkan kekhawatiran pihak kumpeni dan Kasultanan Yogyakarta. Kumpeni kemudian mengirim utusannya. Utusan ini dipimpin langsung oleh Gubernur dan Direktur Java’s Noord-en Ooskust yang berpusat di Semarang, yaitu Jan Greeve.3 Dari tanggal 16 September hingga 6 Oktober 1790, Jan Greeve berada di Surakarta. Tuntutannya satu, yakni Sunan Surakarta harus menyerahkan keempat orang abdi dalem kepercayaannya karena mereka inilah yang dianggap sebagai biang keladi peristiwa. Sumber kolonial menyebut Wiradigda, Bahman, Kandhuruhan, Panengah dan Nur Saleh sebagai panepen yang berarti alim ulama.4 Sumber tradisional Jawa, seperti babad pakepung dan serat wicara keras menyebutnya dengan istilah abdi dalem santri.
Setelah terjadi negosiasi, namun buntu, akhirnya pasukan Kumpeni dengan dibantu oleh pasukan Kasultanan Yogyakarta, pasukan Mangkunegaran, dan Pasisiran mengepung Keraton Surakarta dari berbagai penjuru.
Sunan Paku Buwana IV, melihat kuatnya pengepungan terhadap Keratonnya merasa gentar juga. Akhirnya, atas bujukan dan usaha Kyai Yasadipura I, Sunan bersedia menyerahkan abdi dalem kepercayaannya yang dianggap sebagai biang keladi kekacauan. Dengan ditangkap dan dibuangnya kelima abdi dalem kepercayaan Sunan, pengepungan terhadap Keraton Surakarta dihentikan.
Berdasarkan kenyataan ini, kebijakan politik Sunan pada waktu itu memang banyak dipengaruhi oleh gerakan keagamaan, termasuk ketika Sunan Paku Buwana IV menuntut kepada Kumpeni agar semua penghulu yang ada di Yogyakarta, Semarang, dan daerah Pasisiran tunduk dan mengikuti kebijakan penghulu Surakarta.
Ketika masih berstatus putra mahkota, sikap keagamaan Sunan Paku Buwana IV banyak terpengaruh oleh Wiryakusuma, seorang guru agama yang mempunyai kecenderungan anti Kumpeni. Wiryakusuma adalah putra R.M Kreta yang dilahirkan dan dibesarkan di Cape Town, yang pada masa itu menjadi tempat pembuangan bagi tokoh-tokoh perjuangan yang menentang dominasi Kumpeni. Salah satu tokoh perjuangan yang dibuang ke Cape Town adalah Syaikh Yusuf al-Maqassari, seorang ulama besar sekaligus guru Tarekat Naqsabandiyah.5
Wiryakusumah yang hidup di komunitas orang-orang buangan dari Nusantara mengenal nama dan ajaran tokoh ini, meskipun Syaikh Yusuf sendiri telah meninggal dunia dan dimakamkan di sana. Sikap keagamaan Wiryakusumah yang mengamalkan dzikir dan wirid telah memperkuat indikasi adanya pengaruh ajaran Tarekat Naqsabandiyah dalam dirinya. [bersambung]

Catatan kaki :
1. H.J de Graaf, Geschiedenis van Indonesie. (s- Gravenhage. Bandung: W. van hope, 1949) hlm.279.
2. –Babad Pakepung. Suntingan Teks, Analisis Struktur dan Resepsi, (Yogyakarta: Tesis S2 Universitas Gajah Mada. 1990).
-Serat Babad Pakepung, Alih aksara oleh Sri Sulistiyowati. (Museum Sanapustaka Keraton Surakarta, No. 74 ca-KS#60-Reel 101 #2)
3. Lihat:J.K.J de Jong dan M.L Deventer (eds.). de Opkomstvan het NederlanschGezg in Oost Indie. verzamling van Onuitgegeven Stukken uit het Out-kolonial Archief, Volume XII, (s’Gravenhage: Martinus Nijhoff). 1909), hlm. 209-228.
4. Opkomst, op. cit., hlm. 123.
5. Lihat: Martin van Bruissen. Tarekat Naqsabandiyah di Indonesia. (Bandung: Penerbit Mizan. 1992) hlm 34-42.

PENGADILAN SURAMBI DI KASUNANAN SURAKARTA (BAGIAN 5-SELESAI)

Keraton Surakarta memiliki sebuah struktur pemerintahan yang tersusun atas beberapa lembaga, di antaranya lembaga pengadilan. Secara kelembagaan, pengadilan Keraton merupakan lembaga yang memberi kontribusi dalam upaya penegakan hukum, menciptakan keamanan dan ketertiban di wilayah Kasunanan Surakarta. Sistem Peradilam Keraton juga merupakan lembaga penegak hukum yang berfungsi untuk mencegah terjadinya pelanggaran dan tindak kejahatan yang dapat mengancam eksistensi raja.
Sejak masa Mataram di Kartasura sampai pindahnya Keraton ke Surakarta, sudah ada campur tangan dari pemerintah Kumpeni dalam sistem peradilan di pemerintah Kasunanan Surakarta. Perkembangan selanjutnya menunjukkan penetrasi Kumpeni ke dalam persoalan internal Keraton yang membawa perubahan dalam tata peradilan dan hukum Keraton. Kumpeni berupaya memaksakan rencana reorganisasi terhadap sistem peradilan, dengan maksud supaya pemerintah Keraton menyetujui perubahan baik dalam pelembagaan maupun pranata hukumnya.
Sistem peradilan di Kasunanan Surakarta banyak mengalami perubahan sejak menguatnya penetrasi sistem Kumpeni yang semakin intensif. Reorganisasi sistem peradilan dilakukan Kumpeni secara bertahap. Hal itu menyebabkan kebijakan Sunan banyak dipengaruhi Kumpeni. Meskipun demikian, legitimasi Sunan tetap terjaga di mata rakyatnya.
Intervensi Kumpeni terhadap sistem peradilan menjadikan Sunan hanya sebagai symbol. Kumpeni bertindak sebagai pengendali kekuasaan di wilayah Kasunanan Surakarta.
Reorganisasi sistem peradilan di Kasunanan Surakarta sudah terjadi sejak pemerintahan Sunan Paku Buwana II (1726-1749). Seluruh daerah Mataram masuk ke dalam wilayah Kumpeni. Akibatnya, Metaram bukan hanya kehilangan wilayahnya, tetapi juga harus menyerahkan urusan pengadilan ke tangan Kumpeni. Perubahan yang penting, yaitu : mengenai eksistensi lembaga peradilan itu untuk menjalankan tugas dan wewenangnya. Lembaga peradilan saat itu dikenal dengan Pengadilan Surambi. Pengadilan Surambi merupakan pengadilan agama. Tempat pelaksanaan persidangannya pun masih di lingkup tempat ibadah, yaitu di serambi bagian depan Masjid Agung. Hari persidangan pengadilan Surambi dilaksanakan pada hari sanin sampai kamis.1
Di dalam pemeriksaan perkara, pengadilan Surambi menggunakan kitab-kitab Islam. Selain sumber utamanya al-Quran dan al-Hadis juga digunakan kitab-kitab karangan As-Syafi’I yang disadur dari Al-Wajis dan kitab-kitab karangan Al-Ghazali. Kitab-kitab yang disadur antara lain: Al Muharrar; An-Nihayah, At-Tuffah, dan fath al-Wahab2.
Sebelum reorganisasi tahun 1903, pengadilan berwenang menjatuhkan hukuman kisas (qishash). Eksekusi akibat hukuman kisas secara psikologis merugikan terdakwa dan keluarganya. Namun, hukuman kisas telah terbukti efektif dalam mengurangi kejahatan dalam masyarakat. Sebab, pelaksanaan hukuman kisas tersebut dapat menjadi pelajaran bagi orang lain disekitarnya. Melalui reorganisasi dalam sistem peradilan, Kumpeni berusaha menghapus hukum kisas atas pelaku tindak kejahatan kelads berat. Menurutnya, hukum kisas tidak manusiawi dan bertentangan dengan kondisi social masyarakat Jawa.
Dalam Rijksblad Soerakarta tahun 1930 no.6 disebutkan, pelaksana pengadilan Surambi adalah wedana yogoswara dengan dibantu oleh beberapa ulama dan khatib. Kemudian salah satu dari khatib itu ditunjuk oleh wedana yogoswara sebagai juru tulis.
Pengadilan Surambi menangani perkara-perkara antara lain:
1. Pembunuhan dan perkelahian, yang dibedakan menjadi rajapati dan rajatatu. Dalam hukum Islam pembunuhan dapat dibedakan menjadi tiga macam; pembunuhan secara sengaja, yang dihukum kisas; pembunuhan yang tidak sengaja tetapi mengakibatkan kematian, dihukum denda; pembunuhan karena terjadi kesalahan, dihukum denda (diyat mughaladhah).
Diyat mughaladah adalah denda 100 unta dibagi tiga, sedangkan diyat mupakakah adalah denda 100 unta dibagi lima3. Bila denda tersebut tidak dapat dibayar dengan unta, wajib dibayar dengan uang seharga unta tersebut.4
2. Pencurian dan perampokan. Pada masa pemerintah Sunan Paku Buwana IV, orang yang menginap di rumah orang lain dapat didakwa sebagai pencuri, jiak tuan rumah tempat ia menginap kehilangan barang. Hukuman yang dijatuhkan kepada penginap, jika terbujkti bersalah, adalah mengganti sejumlah barang yang hilang.
Dalam serat Angger Gunung tanggal 12 Oktober 1840, terdapat dua pasal: pasal 81 dan 83 yang menyangkut tindak kejahatan perampokan (njarah rayah) dan pencurian kecil-kecilan (nyolong, njupuk, anyeler, nyebrot, nguntil). Mereka, baik orang yang membantu ataupun yang dibantu (dibaluhi) dalam suatu pemberontakan, akan dipukul dengan rotan/cambuk 200 (dua ratus kali). Dan selanjutnya dibuang ke seberang lautan.
3. Hutang Piutang dan Gadai. Dalam mengatur hutang-piutang, kerajaan menghendaki diangkatnya saksi.5 Oleh Sunan Paku Buwana IV perkara tersebut diatur secara tegas dalam preambule serat Angger Nawala Pradata.6
Sunan membuat aturan tidak hanya memakai saksi dalam urusan hutang-piutang dan gadai, tetapi juga seseorang disarankan untuk membuat perjanjian secara tertulis dengan tanda tangan dari kedua belah pihak.
Pada masa pemerintahan Paku Buwana IX peraturan mengenai hutang-piutang lebih diperketat. Pejabat Kerajaan yang mempunyai hutang dan tidak mampu untuk membayar bisa dipecat dari jabatannya. Sanksi ini dimaksudkan untuk mendidik para pejabat mencerminkan kewibawaan sang raja yang berkuasa.
Dalam perkara hutang-piutang dan gadai, surat bukti pembayaran dan pelunasan utang sangat penting untuk menghindari kesalah-pahaman dan penipuan.7

Catatan kaki:
1 G P Rouffaer loc. Cit. Ninik Kaprajan, (Surakarta: Radya Pustaka). Hlm. 157 – 158.
2 Pawarti Soerakarta. 1939. Op. Cit, hlm.90.
3 M Sulaiman Rasyid. Op. Cit, hlm.403.
4 Serat Sultan Surya Ngalam, (Surakarta: Radya Pustaka. 1765), hlm 2.
5 Ibid, hlm. 26.
6 T Roorda. Serat Angger Nawala Pradata PB IV. Op Cit, hlm. 179.
7 Ibid, hlm. 179.